What iwould vleo to tell my mom

Mom i ncat boleve you
I caont boelve yudid this
You volated my privacey
You crossed the line
I dont give a care if you say it is what was best for me
You dont care You dont
so dont give m e that junk
Dont tell me tyou care you dont
Dont you get it
I didnt trust you befor
/YYou ware strating to get it back
And you crossed the line
And so help me if you ever i men ever
Read my my ims agen
I will get up out of this house adn leave
And i wont come bakc
I dont ask you fpor much
I dont expect you to love me
or hug me
ir evne give a care
Al ll iwant is privicey
Adn you knwo what if ou ever ever
invade my privicey agne
Im leaveing adn im not coeming back
im packing a bag and going whare ever i cna get
So now jsut eave me alone
Im made at you
Im more thne made at you
So jsut leave me alone
Just leave em alone

I woudnt mind if

I woudnt mind if
My emitons would shoosea side
Iwasnt up and thne donw
If litlte words ddint kill me

I woudnt mind if
I was alone
If no one creard
people stoped lving me

I would like if
I could jsut disaper
I coukd hid my face formth e world
My name ws neves said agen

I would like if
I could stand and lookat thme and not shake
I could run away
I woudl disper and no one even noticed

I owuld love if
I stoped hurting pepole
I was good friend
I had the write thing to sty atlest one

I would lvoe if
I could igure out why
If i could jsut wake up and be ok
If i stoed hurting

I would die if
I keep hurting people
there is never an end this
If i never find my place

I would die if
I hurt aanother firned like her
Ifi keep hiring what i do wrong
If i never can get out of this stupid buble

I want to
Figure out why im like this
How to hlep you
How to care better

I want to
Make tihngs write
MAke people laugh
Change you;re world

I am a
looser
a fighter
an ideat

I am
super woman
stronger thne stong
invisable

I am a
broken chiled
perosn who cnat find there way
lost couse

I am
a worrier
A smiling face
a listner

I am
the perons with no answers
the perons ith wrong thing to say
the perosn hwo is hoples

I woudnt mind
I woudl like
I would love
i woudl die
I want
I am

I woudnt mind if you forgot me
I would like if i ocudl disaberp
I owudl lvoe if God gave you someone better
I would die if do that all i agen
I want to stop worring you
I am nothing to be menchind

Its all my falt

The world is falling aprt
It is my falt
My friends hurt
It is my falt
My paritsn are dispiotned
Its my falt
Oh oyu say it as a joke
But my firneds its true
All this pain this hurt
ITs my falt
I ocsed the pain
I coused it all
By the way that k you
THank you for amkeing me parinod
I am scare d of ogf my mind now to hurt peole
beouce ofy ou;tre words
Oh how childish of me
but oh how real it is
Im scared im scared to hurt people becouse of you
I cna tget thos wors aout of my head of thos stupd stuoid words
THere now ne graved in stone
THey wont idsaper
THe ecoh thee hall ways oh my mind
They dance in happness wal lthe couse me misery
How how can such simple words do that
wHy who do i let thme do that
Waht ca i do
Oh turn up the muscie
Oh alt my thoguh diffret awy
Ah the simplesty of not tihnking
Wich the muscie mad eth hrut go away
Please ripe it fomr me
No no
Leave it leave it
I diserv it
I deiserve this hurt
Look waht i have done to thme
TO the people i say i l ove
I diserve th pain
I diserve it all
bEoceu guess waht ?
Its all my falt
ITs all my falt
LEt me write it on the chock bord
Punish me for my trnagresions
MAke em pay for whati ave done
HAve i hurt you ?
THen beat me
Have i amde you cry
THen meake me cry in pain
HAve i killed oy uin side
THe fead my body yot the birds adn kill me
LEt the pain i couse you emisont let that pain be csoeued eto me phyiscley
100 times over urt me
let me die
kill me with the ain i couse ed you
Beocue incase you forgt
ITs all my falt

My words are meaning less
I am meaning lesss
I sit there
no one cares
I do nothng
I am notitnhgh
My name wasnt said once
Im the lackey
All im there foris to make copieys
All i do with frined
Is amke thme angree
I hurt thme
Why dont i jsut kill me
Ill kill my self
adn you iwl lala be all wright
if ido no one will cry
you will alla get over find somen one els
the copy machin wont miss me
MY friends wont miss me
my famly wont miss me
the tearshes who ahve to deal with me wont miss me
there will be an open spot thonig more
Il lbe gone
nottihng more
It woudnt matter
alll i do is make copys
All i do is hurt peooeple
All i do is mkae mpeople want to leabve
Well ill mkae the choice ieasy why donti loveave
Il llevt you be
If i leave no one will hurt
Seee this is all aobut me
Im not good unuf
Wasnt good unuf for soccer
Wasnt good unuf for the paly
Wasnt good u nuf for ER
Soon i wont be good unuf for leadership
So i could jsut leave
woudnt it akme it easer on all of you ?

I jsut i dont know
see ithoguh it was the write things
but the look the look in you;re eye
i know i made you hurt
and who am i
ahhhhhh who am i
i hurt you
and it lookled liek i amost made yo cry
i thouht it was the wright thing but now i see
wh onyt you jsut hate me?
please will you sut hate me thne iould run away thne icoudl die and now one would cry
What a lowsey friend amd i
i made you do someitnhg you didnt want to do
i would hat me
if i was you
and why couse iothugh it was best
man ewho am i
i dnot knwo what best
i am jsut a foool
I act so cool
and play of my mask
oh the mask
i look likei knwo what is best
adn yet who am i
i am such afool
i dont knw waht to do
I play off that im so strong
but wright now iwant to look more doorand spend the day asleep in my room
you want to isolat youres self
i want to to
but im scared of my thoguh
if i jsut keep on movine
i won ahve ot ithnk
if i jsut keep on being buess i wnat have to tkae adrink
What kidna firnd am o
THe kinda that makes oyu wan to sink
the kinda that kema you wnat ot dies
waht kinda frined ma i
i am miserble in all seeesn as a frined who jsut filles you with emtines
oh i cry froy ou
oh i cry for you
you do not diserveiths game
you diserve soeithng so much more tame
some one stabel
soem one mroe able
My God him self kil me
jsut to stop the pain i put you through
LEt Him strick and kill me now
AMbby with rhe flue
with a cari hope its true
jsut kil wme with aknife
i wont put up a fite
Or mabbey kill we with hite
slowly and painfuly if you please
jsut to ttek the pain form thos i've hurt
to help htohs tt i always divert
through meto the curb
PLease jsut dont let thme hurt...

Im tired of messing up jsut so ever one knows
im tired of it.
Im tired of pain.
Im tired of life. Im tired of being the bad guy
Im tired of not habving the write thing to say.
Im tired of lieing. Im tired of being told im not good unuf.
Im tired of being hurt.
Im tired of fealing likei want to cry but never elting my self or never being able to
Im itred of living like this
Im tired of being tires
It tired of being me
Im tired of trying hard
Im tired of working adn getting nothnifg fomr it
Im tire of not being good unuf

I guess stuff ahs jsut been going on this was a gblog befor but i change the adress s my frined asced em if i had delted it oculd ahve told her no and that i jsut chaged the adres but didnt want to cosue this is the only place i cna say what ever i want to say and she wanont get magde at me. Man some times i m tired of that frendship i never say the write thing i never do the writght things atlest weeekly she gets amd at me nad it hurts and im tierd of it im tired of bieng hurt and the thing is sje dosnt even know itry o tel ehr and she jsut gets mead dani pleas dani waht is so stinkin ahard aoubt i dont want to tlakobut it any more what is so hard to udnerst that some one got uncofertable what is so stinkin hard aoubt that to stink undernst hwy cant she. She jsut gets mad she is alway amd at me ialways do soemithg worng i always mkae her mad some how i alwas always do something wong im ena come on me do someitnh write ha thats a joke.

Im tierd of this fealing see i have another frined nad i might have sliped out someoe of how i feal and all and now she is worred im dipressed what she dsont know is that im sue to thins i have felt tihs way for so long i;ve don it all beofr she tihnk when she talks i dont get it but i do i live it. She is awlays worrrded dosnt want me dipresed man i have bne like this forever i didnt know dipresion could couse headachs untl a docter siad it and when my mom asked me if was dipressed i jsut sad no of coures it is totly posible it runs in my family. Ha ha a drunk jerk father whos diressed sont get that that effects kids moving effects fealing hopleslost adn emti nca kinda do this to aperons Peopal not seem to get when isay stuff aoubt my self i have atendince to bolev it and then see it as true its kinds like my way fo crying out i guess. I hate it. I ahte it all. I wish i oculd jsut curl up in a ball and disaper. There are some days i want tocome home and jsut not tlato any one losk my door and not come out. The only reosn idont is cos i have people dipending on me. Ha how funy people dipendiing on someone hwo is faling apart some one who dsont know up fomr down. Ha its funy wrting helps but hurts atll at the same time. I jsut i dont know i jsut wnat it to all stop. Oh and by the way im tited of palying of that stupid stupid maks. I go to churhc usnday night adn ill good smileing having fun adn thne i get home an i fell like imgdiging and i hate it i jst hate it. That is the worst feling in the world goinb g sfrom like over the moon to 6 ft under it kills it akmmes me jstu want to lay in bed and enver move to never ever get bakc up agen.

Im tired of woring poeli realy am. I jsut worry poelp all the item. I ahve a finred that i tnhk i scared good last night. I ddint mean to it jsut jsut hurt. I dont know why. See it wasnt logicla at the piont in time i've felt the pain but usly it coems with my piered and is cramps realy realy bad crams that mkae me puke my guts out. Adn last inght i was so scared i would. I was so glad i could fall aaslepe. I ddint mena to worry ehr but when yu;re stomics husrts liekt hat its not easy to ignor. I nca ignore my knee and head ashc but that one no way its like like soemone is shooting me stabing em Hum nice tohugh someone killing me. Ha hA that a ice though t o ithnk thaat to me it feals nice if soemone wnat s to kil me amni m one meessed up kid nothnig knew though i always knew that. Im just tired of well everthing

A better pale with out me

Do you ever feal like no matter what you say no matter waht you do you are always doing seomthnig wrong. Welcoe to my world. It seems mor eand more no matter what i do no matter whati say i am jsut doing it wrong.I keep starting fights. What ever isay is worng. What ever i do is worng. Im wrong. I almost miss spoke tonight and told a frined why donti jsut go killl my self ill make you;re life a hole lot easer. and when i tihnk abotu it realy think aobut it... its true. If i went off and killed my self it would be better fore ever one. I menai ahve one perons i once kalled my best frined who i am constitly fighitng with and constily geting hr mad at me. Im constintly sayig the wrong thing doing the wrog tihng. I never doanything wright with her. Thne i have a ntohe finred weere i have distruped the order of ehr life. Messed things up with her. Evner as im sitng ehr i have my best frined elling at me. MAbby mabby if you jsut elt me get a few days with out you killing me i owuld be ok. And then tihs over thing frine di know i;ve done things that ahve made her look diffrnet at things or hcange some or waht ever i jsut dont knw if the hcange is good or bad yet i guess tim will tel. My family would e better. I mena sut more mony for my paronts to spend on and another mouth to feed, Another kid to get thorgh colige amni wounder how much mony they would save if iwasn around probley a hug piece of change. My siter would be better of one less anying pest. Kids at school woudnt enve notice. And peole at churho wudnt even care. MY family owuld be glad to get soemone so anying out and frinds the litlt i have would be glad they dot have in inmature little kid aorund, All and all i dont relay doanyitnhg write i mena come on im jsut an ideat an anyng pest. If ikilled my self it woudl be better for the world better for ever one. I ea comeone who wnats me waround? Im jsut some idotice, nasrsitec, anying, pest like, life sucking, uncareing, insenstive, undiservieng, ungratful little ideat who is jsuta pain in eerones butt.

Her lies DAni Boucher. Were glad the grond took her cosue the world sure didnt want her. Praise God she is gone.